I've got a 6yo and a 2yo, and 4pm to 7pm is basically survival mode. I used to think I'd get 'back to myself' when the baby weight came off, but after 12 weeks I'm only down 9 lbs and my brain is still static. What's actually helping: a snack drawer that's not the kids' drawer.
Mine has string cheese, turkey sticks, the little guacamole cups, and a couple of dark chocolate squares. If I wait until I'm starving while making nuggets and pasta, I eat standing up and barely remember it. Now I grab one thing while I plate their food. It's not a miracle, but I feel less feral by bedtime.
I also put my sneakers by the door, which sounds dumb, but I've walked 3 times this week instead of zero. Any other chaotic-mealtime tricks that don't involve cooking two dinners? I miss feeling like a person, not just the snack referee.