The cousins I only see at funerals and weddings

2026-10-11 1249 views 2 posts

I saw a batch of relatives at my cousin's wedding last weekend, first time in about two years. I was braced for the usual “you look different” comments, but most people just hugged me and moved on.

One uncle asked if I was still doing “that shot,” and I said yeah, same as before, and we went back to talking about his garden.

What stuck with me: being around people who knew me at my heaviest didn't send me into a spiral. I ate a normal plate, had a slice of cake, and the sky stayed up. Maybe because I see them so rarely, they aren't carrying the day-to-day version of me.

I've read a bunch of versions of this here over the years, and rare social events seem to hit different. Curious whether other long-timers find them easier or harder than everyday settings.

I actually have a spreadsheet tab called “Family Events” with columns for comments, who said it, what I wore, and my weight that morning. Last wedding: 3 comments. Last funeral: 0. My weight was flat within 0.8 lbs across both, but the bar was open at one and not the other.

Trendline says alcohol proximity predicts commentary better than actual pounds lost. Mildly annoying, but there it is.

Did anyone else notice the “still doing that shot?” question only shows up at events with an open bar, or is that just my relatives?